The Five O'clock Shipment

A customer stands across the counter from me, looking expectant. I smile and ask how I can help. "What time does the 5 o'clock shipment come?" the customer asks. I covertly glance at my watch to confirm that it's 3:45 and give myself time to cast about for a suitable answer, knowing I'll not find one. There's no good way out of this.
"Same time as the 5 o'clock news." Sarcastic, even if I smile.
"In about an hour and a quarter." Just as bad, even if I smile.
"Same time as always, 5 o'clock." Snippy and abrupt. And they'll think I've already heard this a dozen times just today. Which, of course, I have. But I live in the south and have learned a little about language arts ... you can say anything about or to anyone as long as you follow it up with "Bless your heart...." For example, "Don't you know she's gained nearly 40 pounds, bless her heart...." or "Bless his heart, I just know he's drinking a quart a day." So, I smile again and say, "Bless your heart, you are anxious! Should be here in a little over an hour."

I love language. In the 6th grade, I discovered the school library. In junior high school, I found the branch
libraries and in high school, I found the main library...three floor of books and leather chairs with reading lamps.
It was safe, quiet, and you could stay until nine at night and all day on Saturday. The library became a refuge
from the chaos of a home ruled by alcoholism and perpetual rage. Nobody yelled at the library, nobody threatened you, nobody shamed you. And you could get lost in Nancy Drew or H. Allen Smith or best of all, Walter Farley.
The peace of the library was very precious. No harm could come to you, the real world couldn't even come in.
I would take out as many books as allowed and head home slowly, looking forward to the chance that I could get to my room without incident and once again lose myself in language.

My tastes have changed since then and now I spend more time in bookstores than libraries but language is still
one of my favorite things. And I can still find an escape in reading. I never did find all the answers to all the silly and impossible questions but I did make many friends along the way. And the 5 o'clock shipment still comes at 5 o'clock.