Relax, It's Fedex

I listened to the sound of the old car trying valiantly to start - it was a heroic effort but futile. Resignedly I reached for my cell phone, then remembered that I had left it on the charger. Staying positive and trying to forget that it was the coldest day of the year, I returned to the Fedex store where I had just dropped off a package. Excuse me, I said, but my car won't start, I wonder if I could use your phone.

The blank look I got in return should have been a clue but I was cold and a little stressed. The young man who had accepted my package just a few minutes earlier gave me an impassive and arrogant stare. We don't allow personal calls, he informed me in a snide tone and turned his back. I'm not trying to make a date, I said a little sharply, I just want to call for a ride. The second look was pure condescension. We don't allow personal calls, he repeated and jutted out his chin defiantly. Fine, I snapped, Then give me back my package. For a brief second he looked startled. I can't do that, he told me indifferently, It's already in the system. I counted to ten then forced a smile and took several steps toward him. Either you let me make a phone call, I told him, or you return my package. Because if you don't, I'll make a scene that you and all these customers will remember for a very long time. He stared at me for several seconds then grudgingly retrieved the package. I snatched it from his hand and made an infuriated exit to the nail salon next door where they were more than happy to provide me with the use of a personal cell phone - they did it with a smile and without a second thought - and mindful of the temperature, even invited me to stay inside while I waited for help to arrive.

Was it an idle threat? As anti-confrontational as I am, I'd like to think so but as I get older and my idealism is constantly being evicted by cynicism, I find myself more willing to stand my ground. There were people in line at every counter and it wouldn't have taken much to create some attention - a raised voice announcing that my car wouldn't start and that Fedex would rather maintain their no personal calls policy than show the smallest amount of compassion to a customer. Later that night I settled for a nasty email to the company and suggested that they rethink their policy and/or exercise some discrimination in their hiring policies. In the cosmic scheme of things, it will have no effect whatsoever, Fedex is clearly not interested in the opinion of one consumer - cold and stranded as she may be - but I slept better for telling them what I thought.

The world was a nicer place when I was younger and the phrase "customer service" had not become a contradiction in terms.

Relax, it's Fedex, they like to say. Just don't expect the use of a telephone.