The Unexpected

It's the unexpected that brings you to your knees.

For months now, I've been trying to prepare for the inevitable loss of my old tabby and my even older tortoiseshell. They are both thin and wasting away, well into their teens and although they have lived good lives and been well loved, although I know it's time to let them go, it's a decision I've put off for far too long. I was not prepared to face the possible loss of a younger and healthier cat.

I woke to the sound of labored breathing and discovered the small black cat huddled in a corner. One eye was crusted shut, the other filled with pus, his nose was clogged with mucus and one entire side of his face was swollen and covered with scales. In total panic, I wrapped him in a towel and headed for the vet's, convinced that it would be nothing short of a miracle if he survived the 20 minute drive, anticipating every ragged, choking breath would be his last. We made it just as the clinic opened its doors and within seconds he was put on oxygen and fluids, antibiotics were administered, one of the techs gently wiped his eyes with a wet washcloth. I answered questions about caustic chemicals, poisons, toxins, had anything changed in the house, was anything different, could he possibly have gotten outside or gotten into a fight. I watched them draw blood and check for fever, watched the dismayed faces treating him turn from concern to genuine fear then to relief as his breathing eased a bit. They stroked him, talked to him, and soothed him as best they could. On the sidelines, all I could do was pray.

Today as I held the old tabby and the old tortoiseshell and Doc gave them a final injection, I was still praying. Patch went quietly, gently, without fuss or protest, simply laying her head on my arm and drifting off to whatever place is next. Chloe, true to her nature, died as she had lived, growling and pushing back and mad as hell.

Afterward I saw the younger cat, face still swollen but eyes clear and breathing normal, almost well enough to come home. Mercy comes in many forms.